Monday, September 26, 2005

Dumb things I think about

1. Is wearing fake fur as bad as real fur since if you're an anti-real-fur person is it not also still bad to be donning something that looks like real fur?

Cuz there's a really cute faux fur handbag at Target that is cheap and trendy and I really want it but not if it makes me a hypocrite and puts me at risk of being pelted with a bucket of red paint by a spazmodic PETA person screaming "filthy murderer" at me while covered in a lettuce bra and cabbage panties.

2. How do you dudes handle walking into public bathrooms and whipping out your junk in front of strangers all the time?

I know about the unwritten rule of spacing an empty urinal between you and your fellow pee-er, if possible, but are you also not allowed to look? Because if it was standard that women had to flash their tits as soon as they entered the potty, I would totally look.

3. What the hell are those people on LOST using for toilet paper?

If I was stranded on a desert island I'd be totally screwed. It's all about the bathroom for me. Fuck no food, I want Charmin.

And these are the dumb thinks I'm thinking about today.

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