Friday, February 10, 2006

This just in...

O.K. I just got the back. The scan has been done and read. The blood drawn. The future discussed.

The doc had me sit with him in front of the imaging computer and take a look at the pictures just taken. We compared the scan from last March with the bad shadow. His face was somber, he pointed to the spot in my neck with the back of his pen and turned to me. Then he said...













IT'S NORMAL! IT'S NORMAL!

THE SCAN IS NORMAL!!!

HOLY CHRIST ON A BIKE IT WAS NORMAL NORMAL NORMAL!!!

I started to choke up with happiness and disbelief, the look of apprehension still clouding my brow, when he smiled, gently took my hand and said, "sweetheart, I want you to take a breath, go eat a cheeseburger and get on with the rest of your life."

YAY!!

He thinks the spot last year was a remnant of thyroid tissue that's slowly dying off. He can still see a tiny bit left but the spot is smaller than last year so there's NO REASON to think it's the cancer coming back. He warned me that he's not perfect, but in his opinion, IT WASN'T CANCER!! Or to quote, "I'm considering this a normal scan."

He wants me to keep following up with my thyroid doc (of course) and I'll probably have to scan again in 12 months, or if I'm lucky, just an ultrasound, but for now, NO FUCKING RADIATION!! NO SHITTY STUPID DIETS!! NO CANCER!!!

I know I'll have to deal with this shit for the rest of my life and there's a road of recovery ahead and some other shit to take care of, but for right now I'm in the fucking clouds, baby, in the fucking clouds and crying tears of joy and relief.

The last 11 months in particular have been fucking hell. Thinking I had a recurrance was devastating and stressful to say the least. I want to thank everyone who has given me support, wishes, vibes, thoughts, distractions, candles lit, all of it. To my boss - you're a fucker and you can kiss my non-cancer big white ass. HA! (I'll fill you in on that later). And most importantly, a special shout-out to my best girls, FG, Truly, Ginny, Mar, AG, and Scrubby. I am overwhelmed with honor to call these women friends and I love you all more than my luggage.

Who woulda thought I was TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY NORMAL?!?

To quote one of my favorite movies, "laughter through tears is my favorite emotion". Or at least it is today, so spill a little with me bitches! I am one happy mother fucker. Now, you'll have to excuse me. I'm going to go eat the 14 pounds of cheese I bought today and molest my boyfriend till Sunday.

Peace.

sunset

p.s. I took that pic my very own normal self. Good, no?

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