Thursday, May 19, 2005

Blood shed and cable bills

There are a lot of things we're warned about as children. How many times were we told "when you're older, you'll see"? Looking up at adults with envy, wishing to have the rights and benefits that come with that magic age when you're no longer considered a kid.

Whatever that fuck that number is. We all know it's pliable, depending on who you are and what you have between your legs. Society and law have assigned 18 and 21 respectively, but that doesn't mean shit when it comes to maturity. -puts tape on cats paw- There are late bloomers and stunted pysches and people who were born 40 (hi mom!). And despite anyone's particular place in life, one thing remains the same. Our taste for blood.

I was given a lot of advice as a kid. No, scratch that, I was told what to do. What to think, what to wear, etc., etc. I love my parents, but it was not a house of the open mind that I lived in. I still managed to have my own head about certain things, thanks to my large stubborn streak, having polar opposite opinions than my mom and dad.

Despite that, some, I won't say damage, was done, but there are things about my personality that were as bound as a geishas feet. And I'm as hypocritical and guilty as anyone who cranes their head at the carnage on the freeway. However, I'm perplexed at the level some people will go to harass and hound. Even I get affected by this.

I was told about bills and responsibilities and obligations. But I never really had the sense that being an adult would suck so much. I hope every kid is blissfully unaware, or else they might not want to join our club of crap. Wow, that was nice and negative.

I wasn't warned that some people's personailites and behaviors never get beyond 13. That they continue to treat each other with spite and disregard and crave conflict and carnage. Some like to be right in the middle, making the first strike and getting splashed with blood. Some prefer a voyeuristic view on the sidelines, vibrating with glee at the delicious devastation in their purview.

I've experienced some situations recently (too fucking many for my tastes thankyouverymuch) that have gone beyond the comparison of teenage antics and have left a decidedly bad taste in my potty mouth. Those battles between hormone enraged boys and vicious young girls. That's the first thing we think about when witnessing some intense and/or ridiculous drama between adults, isn't it? That they're acting like pre-pubescent children. "OMG, you're so junior high". Their maturity dripping down their chins like the verbal vomit being spewed.

But I don't think this is accurate. It's not like high school, or any grade within the teens. In my own personal observations, it's more akin to the Colosseum of the Roman empire. When thieves, slaves and innocents were thrust into a fight to the death. To be torn apart by hungry lions, their bloody entrails dragged and smeared on the ground to the cheers of the spectators. Willing witnesses by the thousands. Hungry for the sport of human destruction. People who touted themselves as God-fearing and gentle, right there to join in on the horror. Mob mentality is alive and well.

These grim predicaments are unavoidable. We'll all experience strife and drama in our lives. But I think things have been taken to a new and dangerous level. Remember when talking on the phone was the ultimate in invisible protection? It afforded a defcon shield and made things so much easier to say what you wanted, how you wanted because you weren't in the physical proximity of your rhetorical razors. It was technological courage.

With the invention of the internets, the ability to launch hand-grenades has turned into all-out nuclear war, with a side of napalm. Not only do you not have to see the live flesh and blood person on the other end of your attack, but you don't even have to believe they're real. We're all 4 times removed from compassion. The trolls are out in force, the cyber-relationships you try to trust fuck you over, and the psychotics encourage it all. It's unfuckingbelievable.

I wouldn't blame me or anyone else for turning off their system and never flipping the on switch again. Ever.

No comments: