Blah and blah

Man, have I been bored.

Dragging my feet down the hallway falling onto the sofa with a heavy sigh letting my head fall back in dramatic fashion, my eyes slowly scan the room as I try to muster the energy to move one solitary finger to push one lonely little button on the remote so I can watch, eh, whatever. Oh look, it's the fishing channel. Sigh.

~2 hours later~

Standing in front of the fridge. Opening the door. Closing the door. Opening the door. Closing the door. Opening the door, taking out the cheese. Staring at the cheese. Oh no. I have to get a knife. And they're like, all the way over there in the drawer. Sigh.

~eats stale crackers left on counter~

Gets great idea to start a huge project sorting metric ton of paperwork, creating files, throwing junk away, organizing and processing taxes. Digs storage boxes from under the bed, has allergy attack from dust, dumps everything all over bed. Starts working. Gets bored after 20 minutes. Sigh.

~takes nap~

I. Am. So. Burned. Out. Tired of working on this (fucking) house. Dealing with shitholes at work. Feeling like crap and being ignored by Dr's. This crazy, schizophrenic weather that has us shivering and pumping the heat one day and sweltering under the AC the next. WTF, California? Make up your mind.

I don't feel depressed, per say, but just drained. I don't feel well and can barely face the small list of things to finish on the condo and a longer one of general crap that needs taking care of but I'm so over it! I break up with you, house! We're done! Get your shit and go! Wait, it's all my shit! I'm leaving! Well, hopefully. I did sign papers last weekend to put the house on the market but it can't go up until I'm done and give my agent the word.

Oh darn, now you're bored too. Sorry, there just isn't much to talk about that isn't lame and real-lifey and I don't have the brain-power to put together some of the stories I have brewing up here. So, I did what any other self-respecting whiner would do, I done stole a meme from someone who stole it from someone else. Heh. I hope it's at least mildly interesting because I'll have you know that I had to put a major effort to complete this and now I have none left over to bathe.

SEVEN THINGS:

Seven Things To Do Before I Die:
1. Cage dive with great white sharks (I'll be in cage - stop freaking out!)
2. Visit all the countries of my heritage (providing someone will allow me to be unconscious for the entire trans-Atlantic flight.)
3. Meet my birth parents (well now, isn't that a can of worms?)
4. Own my very own horse (and have the cash to do so - those suckers are money-pits.)
5. Drive across the US in a pimped-out RV (god knows I'll need a toilet in the middle of every nowhere there is.)
6. Get the body I've always wanted (GAH)
7. Design and build my own home (you're all invited to the housewarming party. Bring dip.)

Seven Things I Cannot Do
1. Tolerate people who are assholes to animals (hate them, HATE)
2. Cook chicken (seriously - I don't want to touch or look at it or think about it raw and it always turns out tasteless and tough. Just like my Great Aunt Lil.)
3. Eat most veggies (my body soundly rejects almost everything in the veggie section of the food pyramid. It's not my fault I have to eat french fries and chocolate to live.)
4. Drink alcohol (I've developed quite the allergy to it. Quite the mothereffing fricking fracking being punished by God allergy to it)
5. Say the word literally(sounds like I have a mouth full of marbles)
6. Talk about the medical profession without my head exploding (self explanatory)
7. Totally get my shit together (at least it feels that way)

Seven Things That Attract Me to... (a man)
1. If he gets it
2. If he gets it.
3. If it gets it.
4. Not a serial killer.
5. If he gets it.
6. Nice ass.
7. If he gets it.

Seven Things I Say (on a daily basis, I'm not kidding)
1. MOTHER FUCKER
2. My (insert momentary issue) hurts
3. OW!
4. Kee Kee Cat!!
5. Hey, baby.
6. Why can't I get my shit together?
7. I hate this job.

Seven Good Books (these are nothing spectacular like Anna Karenina but I liked 'em and they are just a few off the top of my head)
1. From a Buick 8 (love my Stephen King)
2. A Walk in the Woods (Bill Bryson kicks massive ass)
3. In a Sunburned Country (more ass kicking from Mr. Bryson)
4. Secret Life of Bees (hit me hard, this one, for some reason)
5. Running with Scissors (disturbingly hysterical)
6. A Girl Named Zippy (funny, funny)
7. Anything by David Sedaris ('nuff said)

Seven Good Movies (Again, just off the top of my head but you should see them!)
1. Dodgeball (never tire of this)
2. Parenthood (one of my all-time fav's)
3. Shaun of the Dead (now that's how you do a zombie movie)
4. Rear Window (effing classic)
5. Staying Alive (do no doubt me, just watch it, and you'll see...)
6. Sixteen Candles (I will marry Jake Ryan one day. Oh yes I will)
7. Raising Arizona (pure genius)

Seven Blogs To Tag (If you're not on the list don't be mad, I think you're all pretty)
1. http://www.izzlepfaff.com/ (he makes me weep with laughter)
2. http://www.stuffonmycat.com/ (my daily laugh)
3. http://gofugyourself.typepad.com/ (brilliant and evil)
4. http://nowthepartysover.blogspot.com/ (funny lady)
5. http://weetabix.diaryland.com/ (could write about shoelaces and make it interesting)
6. http://badnewshughes.blogspot.com/ (doesn't write often enough for my tastes)
7. http://whiteyforgot.blogspot.com/ (have to include my baby)


Alright, yous, chew on that for a minute while I cook something new up. (Not chicken.)