Drive By Blogging

I’m sneaking a quick post on my lunch hour because no, there is not enough time on the weekends or after work during the week and I’m not lying whatsoever. And even if there was time I’m too tired, which isn’t a lie, and most of all I'm super lazy and yes, I left cat barf on the floor again this morning without picking it up because, sweet fancy Moses the cat barfing going on in our house.

So I survived my first week in my new position at my same company, hardly with the help of my old boss might I add, who decided to ditch our little chat we were supposed to have last Friday and a bunch of shit didn’t get wrapped up, my questions weren’t answered, and it caused me much stress and cursing every damn since my last over there and has totally impacted my new job too and jeez I can't stand that man he is totally useless and imcompetent but I won’t go into it so consider yourselves lucky!

You know how I was all excited about the new job? Yea, well, that excitement lasted all of about an hour when I realized that the chick who’s supposed to be “training” me, and I use that term with a hint of disdain, has planned on using me as her personal filing bitch and label-making whore.

I’d already accepted the fact that I was moving from a private office into cubicle world. Hey, I was getting more money and away from that toxic environment and shititude of my former boss. And who I am to be all scoffy with an up-turned nose at a cubicle. Am I better than the thousands upon thousands of people who also spend their days in a cube? Well, actually, yes. Yes I am.

You see, I’m a naturally loud person and my voice carries quite far without much effort from me. You need your friend’s attention across that crowded bar? I’ll yell their name. You need someone in a coma to wake up? I’m your girl. I’ve spent my whole life starting a conversation with my mother to watch her face contort into a grimace of pain while she hisses “Not so loud, I’m right in front of you.

Although you can’t really give her reaction much credence because my mother has the hearing of a German Shepard with satellite dish ears, but I will admit, I am loud. And the area I’m in is what I’ve now nicknamed “The Morgue”. Everyone is unnaturally quiet and I was given the official whispered warning last Monday that I’d better be prepared for complete silence because that’s the way everyone likes it around here thankyouverymuch, no radios, no personal phone calls, there are eyes and ears everywhere, and watch yourself. And it's very cliquish. Not the freindliest bunch of zombies.

So much for the relaxed environment I was sold when I took this job.

And the worst part, my back is to my cube opening and the big bosses fucking office door, so not only am I jumping to the ceiling when someone walks in to talk to me but every time the boss walks into the hallway he has a clear view of my monitor. When the hell am I supposed to read blogs and play games?? I can get 8 hours of work done in 4 and that’s what I had planned on doing. But noooooooooooooo. Doesn’t look like that’ll be the case. And I’m totally paranoid. This is not much of an improvement.

I’ve been having constant conversations in my head about it. It’s not so bad. It is bad. At least I’m away from those stupid people and that stressful position. I’m so far out of my comfort zone why did I do this. So what’s the big deal if they pay me more money to basically be a file clerk. Being a file clerk fucking sucks!!

I don’t know. I guess I’ll give it more time. Jebus knows I don’t have the energy to pursue something new right now, but man, it felt really good to be that happy and it feels really crappy to not.

In other news, apparently I’m unable to eat soup without it spilling down my face like I have a hole in my lower lip. Not only did I further stain my shirt right between my boobs that I already stained this morning with hair goo and didn’t notice until I got to work, but the dudes who are going to try and rearrange my cubicle just left and only then did I notice I had a big dried yellow splooge of Healthy Choice Chicken and Dumpling Soup on my fucking chin.

Good times.