Scene: sitting on the couch watching TV out of the corner of my eye I see a figure in white swirling about the front yard seeming to repeatedly bump into a trashcan.
Me: Oh, fuck. I think we have zombies now. Have we not been through enough in the last fucking week?
Him: No problem. I know how to handle that.
Me: Are you sure?
Him: Oh yea.
Me: Really sure?
Him: ~with breezy confidence~ Totally.
Me: What do you do?
Him: It’s simple.
Me: Oh yea?
Him: Yep. You just remove the brain.
Me: ~whining~ OMG. I have to cut off heads now? I don’t want to have to cut off heads.
Him: That's what you gotta do.
Me: Can they get into the house? Like smash through windows and shit?
Him: Yea, but they move really slowly. Don’t worry. I’m on it.
Reason 1 million and ninety three why I love this man.
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5 comments:
so glad you two have each other!
"Yeah, but they move really sloly. Don't worry, I'm on it."
No wonder you love him, he's so practical! What was the white thing swirling and bumping into your trashcan?
Actually, according to Shaun of the Dead, the Best Zombie Movie Ever, you just have to bash their heads in. No brain surgery-- just a cricket bat, shovel, or other bashable object. Good luck with that.
Well, yeah. I was going to say shoot them in the head, but we have no guns and that would have only caused more concern and isn't the whole truth.
Just kill the brain. Do it with a bullet, an axe, some velcro or a sick rabbit...whatever you like. Everybody knows this.
I can't wait.
And that right there is the irritating part!
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